Extract from The Rainbow Way: Cultivating Creativity in the Midst of Motherhood

I am so sorry things are so quiet round here - I am proofing The Rainbow Way for the final time before I send it off to the publishers to edit and proof all over again! It is currently out with a number of my heroines awaiting possible endorsements, so do keep your fingers crossed for me!

 So whilst I don't have the time or energy to be writing a post right now, I thought I could share some of my words from the book with you, as I know so many of you are dying to get your hands on it!

Summer Dreams - Lucy H Pearce

Catching Creativity 

Often inspiration comes at the most unlikely of times – when you are driving the kids to school or changing a nappy, making dinner or falling asleep. Creative mothers recall with a laugh, writing ideas down on the nearest thing to hand, old envelopes, shopping lists and even toilet paper, so that they did not disappear forever. That was certainly my experience in writing this book. This is because the conscious mind is not in charge of creativity – instead it emerges when the mind is relaxed and the body is engaged in a repetitive, habitual activity, or is deeply relaxed, so that the brain is ticking over, but not fully engaged.

Like falling in love or giving birth, the creative process has been described by thousands of voices over the years. But each of us can only touch on the memory of this elusive experience. We cannot transmit it to others through words alone. This is where the power of metaphor can help.

Catching creativity is like catching butterflies – fast-flying, bright coloured sparks darting here and there, it requires quick wits, good eyes and desire to net them. And once you have them, you need to act fast. An idea, like a butterfly doesn't last long: it is ephemeral. It is here, and now it is gone – so quick, grab your laptop, your pen and paper, your Dictaphone, your sketch pad, whatever your mode of expression or recording, swoop and catch.

Another metaphor – it is like spotting wild horses in the desert, all is quiet and calm on the horizon of the desert mind, a dust storm here, a vulture here, then suddenly over the horizon there thunders a herd of wild horses. Where they came from is not known, nor where they are going. If you spot them you can follow them on foot, running fast to keep up, you might get a sense of their size, their energy, their number and colour, and then they are gone, as quickly as they arrived. You are left with the bones, the bare bones in the desert. Your expression will never be the horses, it can never match them, it will be your impression of the horses. You will always be matching it up to that illusive, fleeting perfection of their vision when you saw and felt them. No one else saw them, so no one else can really know. Only your expression can, in some way, communicate these wild horses to the world. And if you choose not to chase them, because you're too busy, you didn't know how or you weren't ready, the image of these escaped horses may haunt you, lurking in your creative mind forever more – you will see other horses, other landscapes, but those horses, that desert, that day, are gone for good.

Catching creativity is like hearing the music of the carnival in the distance, carrying on the wind. It sounds enticing, though you cannot see it, you can imagine the colours, the smells, the energy of carnival. The wind changes direction and you lose the sound again. All you have is the impression, the memory. Without the sounds there to reawaken your sensory memory it's more challenging to recall it and recreate it, but when you do, the sounds waft closer, the carnival is alive in your mind.

Copyright Lucy H Pearce, this extract is from  The Rainbow Way: Cultivating Creativity in the Midst of Motherhood, out late 2013, published by SoulRocks.

OOO

The Rainbow Way…

• o   Embraces the many different shades of creative mother and provides structure, support and possibility for your own unique journey.
• o   Shares a lost feminine archetype, the Creative Rainbow Mother.
• o   Integrates creative, personal and spiritual development.
• o   Honours a creative mother’s dual soul yearnings in a practical way, offering a “road map” to creative motherhood which speaks to body, mind and soul.

Visioned as the guide and mentor that most creative women yearn for, but never find in their daily lives, The Rainbow Way explores the depths of the creative urge, from psychological, biological, spiritual and cultural perspectives. This positive, nurturing and practical book will help to empower you to unlock your creative potential within the constraints of your demanding life as a mother.

Featuring the words of over fifty creative mothers: artists, writers, film-makers, performers and crafters, including:

• ·         Jennifer Louden (multiple best-selling author)
• ·         Pam England (author , artist and founder Birthing From Within)
• ·         Julie Daley (writer, photographer, dancer and creator of Unabashedly Female)
• ·         Indigo Bacal (founder of WILDE Tribe)
• ·         Foreword by Leonie Dawson, author, artist, entrepreneur and women’s business and creativity mentor).

Joy Pockets

My pockets of joy from the week...

Printing possible covers for The Rainbow Way

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Daffodils and an afternoon snow flurry - the wonder of March.

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Adventures with our kiddies - visiting their grandparents in different countries.

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Anticipating foil wrapped easter eggs nestled in the garden.

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The Rainbow Way out for testimonials with heroines... and some very positive first comments.

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 A blog post that went nuclear - it got nealy 3000 page views in 4 days, and has helped over 30 families that I know of!

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Three generations making art together.

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Receiving my book contribution from Pam England of Birthing from Within.

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The Taste of Cherry Blossom (the title of  a piece of my food writing which has been accepted for the next BlogHer book, Roots, which is all about food and our connections to it.)

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Reading great books - Many Lives, Many Masters and Daring Greatly

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Pork pie with cheese and pickle.

Please do share yours below.

I don't know what's wrong with my child... (and an almost magic bullet)

If you're a parent, I need you to read this post.

And then I need you to share it with every parent you know.

Not because it's particularly well written, or because I'm trying to build my blog readership. And not because I'm being paid - I'm not.

But because the information below changed my life. And those of lots of other parents and children who were suffering, really suffering, and didn't know what was wrong.

And it's something so simple. Not mumbo jumbo or new-fangled. But a simple, age-old child-health issue that is not well-publicised. And it needs to be, because according to medical research it affects 70% of children in the UK.

If you have kids between 2-7 and they are:

• out-of-character
• agitated 
• uncomfortable in their skins
• tantrumming a lot
• nightwaking, agitated at night - twitching, crying out in sleep
• really angry
• tummy aches, constipation
• itching their bum and/ or vulva 
• craving sugar... 

Then I really recommend you read on. And if it doesn't apply to you now, file it in your brain for future reference. (And what I'm writing about isn't exclusive to this age range at all, it can affect the whole family - it just seems to be the most common age and the most severe symptoms.)

Our story...

We couldn't cope. Really couldn't cope.

Our child was tantruming multiple times a day. She was, and I do not use this term lightly, like a child possessed. She was deeply uncomfortable in her skin. She was on sugar benders, endlessly needing more food, never satisfied. Nightwaking. Furious on waking, going straight into a tantrum. Grinding her teeth. Sometimes constipated. Often had a sore vulva. It was leading to school refusal, deep family turmoil and exhaustion. We didn't know what was wrong, or what we could do. Month after month. The doctor couldn't help nor could books, school, friends, family or Dr Google. And then our second daughter started to echo this behaviour. It was our lowest point in family life - we couldn't cope, couldn't cure, didn't know where to start.

I sound like I might be hamming it up. I'm not. I called the Samaritans. It was THAT serious.

And then, one day, when I was melting down on a private Facebook group, another mother made a suggestion that changed our lives.

Have you considered worms? she suggested, tactfully.

No, not earthworms, but tiny worms, threadworms, pin worms, that live in the guts, and come out and lay their eggs at night.

I know, it ain't pleasant, and I'm sorry if I've just put you off your breakfast.

Sure I knew about worms - I had looked out for them, considered them as a possibility. I had checked her poos, and she didn't seem to itch her bum: my girls had none of the well-known signs. So I had discounted them.

But this mama said, and I say too, that all the symptoms that I listed at the top of the post, are the other, real symptoms which are less well publicised, that we parents aren't aware of. But they are on the homeopathic list of symptoms for worms. And on the piece of paper that comes with the medication for them. And what is more, your kiddies might not have all the symptoms, just one, or a couple . And a lot of them are common behaviours for kiddies that age anyway. And if the infestation has been going on for a while, you might just think that your child is just a very challenging child, or going through the terrible twos, or have a food intolerance, or is quite disturbed...

Treatment...

First we tried the homeopathic treatment on the recommendation of a trained homeopath mama on the same Facebook page: Cina. We could only get 6C in our local area and it didn't work. Apparently you need 30C or 200C. (Again I ain't a homeopath, get further advice).

So then we tried the over the counter cure - (in Ireland it is available without prescription, it is my understanding that a prescription is needed in the UK and US). Vermox. It is a one tablet treatment. A pack of 6 tablets costs €3.50, and the whole family needs to be treated at the same time, the same as with nits and other infectious parasites. It is not an expensive or lengthy treatment. And the tablets are chewable or can be swallowed in one. We all found them easy to take.

Within three days we had our girls back again. They were sleeping, not sugar craving, infintely calmer. We went from 2-3 tantrums a day, to 1 in  a whole 3 weeks. We went from school refusing to happily skipping off to school with a smile on her face. The anger was gone. The tooth grinding was much less. The sore yoni, the wriggling, the constipation. Gone, gone, gone.

I don't mean to be evangelical, but that is the truth. For the first time in months, perhaps a year, parenting our children was a pleasure, they were happy, relaxed.

And all because of one tiny tablet.

And they are not without mild side effects. We all had tummy aches for a few days. But even us adults felt better, and again we had had no itchy bum symptoms either.

And then, three weeks later, to the day, the symptoms started to come on again. At exactly the time a second follow up dose is required. Then we knew we were not living in cloud cuckoo land, that it definitely was not a placebo. Another dose, and three days later calm was restored. Our first dose was 2nd of February. That was the day our lives changed. And since then we have had 2 tantrums!

Now I know many of you natural mamas don't like medication. That's fine, find your own paths. There are natural remedies, like garlic on the butt hole, and hideous herbal concoctions. But even the writers of books on herbal remedies admit how hard it is to treat naturally, and how easy it is with one, possibly two hits of Vermox.

 A little more about worms:

The eggs are tiny, pretty much invisible to the naked eye, the females (thin white threads about 5-10 mm long) crawl out of the guts where they live to lay them round the anus at night, their life cycle is about 3 weeks.

You don't catch them from family pets, but from fruit and veggies, and from other people - think about little kiddies itching their bottoms and then, at some point putting their fingers in your mouth or theirs, or on something that goes into your mouth, that's why they're so easy to catch, and spread so quickly amongst little kids. Their eggs can even be transported as dust. See more here...

Along with treatment, you need to make sure bedding is washed regularly, and handwashing is prioritised.

In the past families used to worm their kiddies a couple of times a year, just like they do with their family pets. But now we are not told about it.

On a mission...

So I'm making it my mission to change that. We have told the school. I am going to write something for school. And am going to approach our health authorities. All it would take is an information leaflet given to every parent at the two-year-old check up. Just a mention to parents at well-child check ups. Because it's 70% of kids we're talking about. And it's something which doctors aren't talking about (I took both my girls for check ups with all of these "other" symptoms mentioned and neither doctor picked up on it as a possibility.) It's only a little thing, but it has such an enormous effect on children's, and family's lives.

I am writing this post, because everyone who knows me says I must. Because of how much it has changed our lives. And how it could change yours.

Please note I am NOT since last time you read this suddenly a medical doctor - so do your own research, ask a professional, talk to your doctor, your pharmacist, be a grown up! But I just really wanted you to know.

Joy Pockets

It's Friday, it's Joy Pockets - haven't done them for ages! Apologies for it being so quiet round here on the writing front, I have been up to my eyes editing The Rainbow Way. It's nearly, nearly done, my part of it, any way, before I send it to the publishers at the end of April. I'm hoping to get it out for testimonials before I go away next week - eek! It's going out to a LOT of my heroines. Fingers crossed for me!

Freshly baked ginger cake for breakfast (get my recipe here!)

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 Looking forward to our all-girl adventure on an airplane - Meli's first time - we're off to see Granny!!

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Spring flowers

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Easter holidays

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A warm house on a stormy day

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The Dance of the Dissident Daughter (anyone here read it?)

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That my daughter wants to be an artist when she grows up

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Nearly finished the biggest writing project I've ever done

What are your gratitudes this week?

Bringing Spring In

We have been bringing spring in - in our craft, the flowers on our nature table...

Spring, welcome to the Pink House! We've been waiting for you!

Come on in (she threaded the big string of rainbow beads all by herself this morning!)

We're getting excited about our annual cherry blossom picnic - the buds are swelling - when will it be?
(Art by Lucy Pearce - for sale!)

Through the ice window

It has been bitterly cold outside here, spring may have sprung, and the flowers are up, but yesterday the polar wind was howling right down from the north, and so we snuggled up warm in front of the fire with a movie, and watched the snowflakes swirling in the late afternoon light.

It was too cold to spend much time outside. But in five minutes.... and a little waiting time... we made magic!!  It's been ages since we've made and shared some ephemeral art on Dreaming Aloud - I LOVE doing it - read more about it here!

An ice window! Which is now swinging on our washing line, glimmering icily in the bright morning sun.

And you can make one too if the cold winds are blowing round your way... It's a great nature activity to get everyone, big and small outside and active for a short time before running in to warm up with hot chocolate and marshmallows...

The next chilly day, gather some spring flowers and leaves from your garden, sprinkle them into a bowl of water, and leave overnight to freeze. Simple as that.

Then.. in the morning, magic will have happened! Lift your ice window out of the bowl and hang it on the line!

Happy Birthday Dear Book Baby

Moon Time is one!

As my first book baby celebrates her first baby she is really standing on her own feet and I am one very proud mama.

She has sold over 500 copies, putting her in the top 1% of self-published books. Sales are rising month on month, and are now at 2 copies a day! Women in Australia, New Zealand, Mexico, America, Canada, Brazil, Alaska, Belgium, Germany, Sweden, Denmark, France, England, Ireland and South Africa have my book on their shelves, in their bags and beside their beds, with pages turned down, ready to come back to another month. I know because they tell me. They email me every week to tell me how my words have changed their lives.

“Life changing” is a term that comes up a lot in those emails. It is not a term I take lightly. To have made an impact on another woman’s life, one whom I have never met, to have helped shift her self-concept, alleviate her physical suffering with my words, brings tears of gratitude to my eyes every time.That women who don’t even know me take the time to write emails and cards of thanks, sharing their life stories and intimate details touches me profoundly.

My book has been to four festivals and conferences in two countries – in Cork and Dublin in Ireland, and London and Devon in the UK. And every time the response is the same. Women pick her up, cradle her in their hands, and begin to tell me, a complete stranger about their cycles, their body wisdom, their hurt, their pregnancies, and pain, their births and bleeding. This little book is a wonderful ice-breaker to get us women straight into deep personal dialogue.

My little book has been the seed that has started two red tents that I know of and a couple of women’s groups. It has given many women the courage and desire to come off the Pill and have IUDs removed. It has given women the tools to shift their cycles so that they ovulate on the full moon and bleed with the dark. I know all this because they have told me. See what some women have said about it here. 

And then women come back to buy moon dial mandalas, and a copy for their sister or best friend, and woman by woman Moon Time is shared. I am very grateful to have been called to be her mama, constantly aware of how much I do not know – but delighted to be part of her magic.

Thank you to every one of you who have bought a copy, told a friend about it and cheered me on.

Check out my new piece in Rhythm of The Home

The Spring issue of Rhythm of the Home is out today - and I have a piece in it ...

Labyrinths of sand – a walking meditation

Circling inwards, eyes down, the sweeping lines of the labyrinth guide me. Though my mind wants to make sense of it, and plan ahead, I quieten it down. All I need is trust: follow the pattern, go with the flow.

My feet follow the spiral path which will lead me to the center and out again. I breathe deep: inspired.

The waves dance in and out on the beach beside me, whispering their song as they lap on the shore. The lines of the labyrinth ruffle the smooth beige sand, cool and damp beneath my feet. I rest in the center. Looking out on the vast ocean, wave upon wave into infinity – I enjoy the sense of my own smallness. The gentle breeze caresses my cheeks; the warmth of the sun soaks through my skin. I drink in the sounds of the seagulls wheeling overhead and my children filling buckets with sand, somewhere far off a dog is barking. But here I am, quietly centered in the midst of the busy world. I feel myself fully rooted in the present moment, connected to the flow of life. For the first time all day my thoughts slow down to near stillness, I can feel myself breathing deep into my belly. I am here.... Read more...

I wrote this piece about 9 months ago for the Rhythm of the Home book, which will sadly no longer be happening. So I thought, once I had gotten that news, that it still needed to appear in Rhythm of the Home magazine. Oh, and whilst we're talking Rhythm of the Home - they always run a giveaway when they launch a new issue - to be in with a chance to win an e-copy of my most recent book, Moods of Motherhood, be sure to enter.

The labyrinth has been getting stronger and stronger for me. It has become the central motif in my third book,  The Rainbow Way to describe the creative path. And then it has just touched me again from Sue Monk Kidd's wonderful, Dance of the Dissident Daughter, which I read this week and has quickly become one of my all time favourite books, where she uses it as a symbol of a woman's journey - I adore her interpretation of the Ariadne myth.

Does the labyrinth call to you - do you find yourself drawn to  walk them, draw them, do you like to make them from clay or sand? Or are they a new discovery to you? I'd love to hear your thoughts...

A Virtual Mother Blessing

This post is one of a series of posts from the Irish Parenting Bloggers to welcome two baby girls to two of our Irish Blogger Mamas,  Lisa and Aine, and is also dedicated to two other mamas who are close to my heart and due any day now, Lydia and Erin. 

We live in a baby-centric world which is delighted to pat your belly and coo over your baby. 

We offer baby showers. To shower the glowing mama-to-be with gifts of nappy cakes and baby bouncers, vests and toys. But somewhere, in the midst of it all, something rather important is often lost....

That's right. YOU. Dearest mama.

We ask how's the baby? What's the baby up to? When are you due?

But not the most important question of all - how are you?

How are you mamas? In the complexity of it all, can you share your longing, your worries, your hopes, your boredom, your excitement, your multiple discomforts, the love which pierces your heart and makes it feel it might explode,  your bone shattering exhaustion, your need to be held and cared for, and your tigress desire to be left alone...

In our community of women, we offer something different to the traditional baby shower: a mother blessing. Something which is dedicated to caring for you. Nourishing you. Holding you. Loving you. Listening to you. 

A sacred circle surrounding you. Sharing our wisdom. Hearing your fears. Massaging your hands, soaking your feet, painting henna on your belly, brushing your hair, lighting a candle each for you wishing you blessings on your birth and new child. Sometimes we string a necklace with wishes or birth stories, we burn fears on the fire, other times we make a belly cast and paint it, or trace clay labyrinths with our fingers. And finally feasting with you and filling your fridge and freezer with nourishment for the weeks ahead.

This I offer you here. And I light a candle for you.

Blessings on our children, for they have a long way to go,

Blessings on our elders, for they have travelled far.

And blessings on those of us in between, for we are doing the work. 

Please accept this virtual mother blessing to nourish your body and soul, which never for a second stops nourishing that precious life within.

May it sustain you during the birth, and in the days and weeks after. 

May you learn the art of surrender with grace. May you be humbled in the face of your immense power. May your heart be broken open with tenderness. May you be held up on wings of love.

Blessings on you, dearest mama. 

x

Check out yesterday's post at The Clothesline             

And be sure to check out tomorrow's at The Nest                                      

The Gathering: A Hundred Thousand Welcomes to the Land of Broken Dreams

2013. The year of The Gathering.

"The what?", I hear you ask, if you're not from these climes...

The Gathering...

"Cead mile failte." The traditional Irish greeting of a hundred thousand welcomes is being proffered by the Irish tourist board and government, as an initiative to tempt rich Americans and anyone lucky enough to have escaped the country, recently, or centuries ago, back for a holiday, to show off our cultural finesse, gloss over the economic meltdown and then turn them upside down, so the gold falls out the bottom of their pockets and plugs a hole in this sinking ship of a nation (is that enough mixed metaphors for you?!)

Meh.

Gabriel Byrne referred to it as a "scam" and a "shakedown". And he'd be right. And it is shallow. It says, we want you if you have money, but not needs.

In reality this is not the year of the gathering, but a Leavetaking, or Scattering. Last year 238 left our shores. Everyday. From a country of only 4 million.

And it's not just European immigrants heading home now times are tougher. 53% leaving are native Irish. 87,100  of our population left in the 12 months to April 2012, according to the Central Statistics Office. They are expecting the same figures again for 2012-13. 

This is the land of the hundred thousand goodbyes.

Phew, fewer kids to pay for, you can hear the government sigh. Fewer sick people to deal with. Fewer on the dole. Fewer people in need of services. Yes but less taxes, less diversity, fewer families together. This is a brain drain as our youngest and brightest leave these shores. And many young married couples who had studied abroad, intending to head home to start their families, stay away because of the lack of prospects.

I don't know of anyone coming to the Gathering. But I know of families leaving. Posting their house keys through their doors, because they can't sell, because they're in negative equity, and they can't pay their mortgages. Families who came over to work for companies which are now barely surviving. Who have taken two pay cuts in a year. Every family I know lives under the constant stress of their main wager earner losing their livelihood. Families going to Australia in their droves, leaving behind grandmas and parents and siblings.

We came home to Ireland 8 years ago. After years of living in the UK and travelling. It truly felt like a home coming. It was my dream come true to be finally living in the community of my birth, close to two sets of parents. But now I'm not so sure, almost everyday I wonder would the grass be greener elsewhere?

Welcome to the land of a hundred thousand broken dreams.

Singing in the background

I had a call out of the blue two days ago. A US publicity company wanting to sell their extortionate services to me as a self published author.

Don't you want to get your message out to a wider audience? The robot-like calls rep wanted to know.

It's a no brainier surely? Or at least it was for her. Cos as an author you want your voice to be heard everywhere, right?

Ummm, no.

My soul sister challenged me on this too when I launched Moon Time. She didn't get my reticence, my lack of confidence to share my creative baby. My level of self doubt.

It's still there. I am so happy with each woman who discovers my work and loves it. So happy to share my work woman to woman. But reaching out into the big wide world beyond, the mainstream, full of critics, nay sayers, cynics, people whose job it is to knock people down and ridicule then. No thank you!

So on the back of my sharing this call on Facebook I was contacted by a woman who does media training for women. And I really like the look of what she does. But still the assumption that I would want to put myself out there to everyone was there. And the response in me was still no.

I feel like a newborn meerkat. All pink and hairless. Blind and weak. And the world feels full of hyenas that eat things like me for breakfast.

I love doing what I do. But it scares the hell out me. It's very niche. And its powerful. And it's finding its audience. But it takes every ounce of my courage to do it. I am so far out of my comfort zone it aches. But it's flowing. And it's healing me, and my friends and women I've never met. So I trust. And I carry on, deeper and deeper into my work, sharing it woman to woman. No big media shows here.

And then last night I had a powerful dream.

I was asked to help at a friend's wedding, and of course volunteered. Then she said what she'd really like was me to sing. I said fine, even though I get really nervous singing in public. But it was just a small wedding full of friends.

But then, because her mum is pretty famous, all these A List celebrities started turning up, and performing, and I was shitting it. My turn was coming. I was too small, my talents too meagre for a big stage alongside such heroes. But then a small wise voice from somewhere said, "we want you to sing, it's important to us that you do. You don't have to be on the big stage, but sing. As the action is happening just sing your words."

So I started to sing, standing at the back of the room, quietly at first as I found my confidence, then richer and louder. My words were: All is love. I wove my melody. And people turned from the main stage and looked my way. One by one. And I kept on singing. Not centre stage. Not the main event. But a voice which drew people in. And I knew I was playing my part, honouring my promise.

And that's what I'm doing with my work too.

And I am allowing for the fact that this too might change. That one day I will be on the main stage. But that is not my intention or my overriding aim.

And so I stand, singing at the back of the room, delighted by every head that turns my way, drawn in by my voice.

Buried treasure: The Thought Birds

I am tired. I am busy. I have sick kiddies, again. It's moon time. It's raining....

For all these reasons and the fact that I have a dozen drafts that I can't knock into shape, instead I am unearthing buried treasure from the Dreaming Aloud archives to share with you... This is one of my favourite posts...ever... I only wish I'd kept it to submit to Tiny Buddha!

Sending you LOVE for Valentines Day. 

Image: www.dipity.com

Sometimes we get our knickers in a knot about our thoughts. They seem to fly round and around. We are told to control them by the self help movement. They're only thoughts, so stop thinking them.

But what if you can't?

Because what if YOU are not thinking them?

What if they are not YOUR thoughts?

Listening to Byron Katie's Loving What Is (of which I have mixed opinions), and she says. You can't stop thinking your thoughts... they come to you, you do not create them, nor can you stop thinking. Your choice is not to attach to them.

Buddhist thinkers including Thich Nhat Hanh talk of thoughts as like clouds, floating over the clear sky of the mind. We need to not focus on them, or attach to them, simply observe as they float by.

But like much in Buddhist thought I find this too bland and beautiful an image for my jingly, jangly, chattering mind.

And then it came to me.

They are not clouds, calm and serene. They are birds. The thought birds. Flying over, squawking and chattering to each other. Migrating to warmer climes. There, on the chimney of my mind, they alight to refuel from my brain juice.  The collective unconscious becoming manifest within the consciousness of an individual. And so I feed them with my own life force. They are wild things and soon ready to fly on, sustained for their journey to another soul. But I, being human, seek to hold on to them, imprisoning them in my head.  I put them in cages in the zoo of my mind. See, people, these are MY thoughts, look at them all here on display. And so they sit and pine, their heads droop, and so does mine as the task for caring them all overwhelms me. I am tired and sad from being their keeper. Their colours fade. They begin to bang their heads on the walls of my mind. Let me out, let me out! The noise of the rattling cages is overwhelming. I become angry, depressed.

But wait. The answer is simple. Open the doors of the cages and let them fly free. The thought birds are wild creatures. They are not my burden. Let them fly free. To visit another soul with their messages, to sing in another ear. Let them fly free. Welcome them to stop by for a moment, then watch them fly free.

Rocking the big P! Making Pinterest work for you!

Listen, I love Pinterest. I've made no secret about that.

But I know a lot of people who managed to get themselves an account, but then just follow from the side lines. 

If you're one of those it's my self-proclaimed duty today to get you all fired up - and getting the most out of Pinterest.  After all, you joined cos you liked the look of it. But then maybe you got all flustered or overwhelmed. We're sorting that out right now! 

And if you've started but want to build your following, these tips helped me quadruple my followers from 120 to 500 in less than 3 months.

Why does Pinterest matter?

• It is a virtual mood/ vision board for anything you are dreaming up
• It will fire up your creativity. Guaranteed.
• You will discover loads of like minded foodies/ creatives/ mamas all around the world.
• It's cheaper than buying magazines and books. It's free!
• Looking at your boards is like bathing in beauty, it gives you a great beauty boost.
• It's a great way to archive links that you love so you don't lose them.
• It's a great way of sharing your own links to your creations, blog, shop etc.
• It is, in the words of Suzanna Conway, a magazine of you.

So first things first.

What lights you up? What are you obsessed by/ What makes your heart beat faster. (These things do it for me...) Set a timer for 5 mins, free-write everything down.

1) Now create new boards for each of these. This will help you to categorise, and make sure you are passionate about what you're pinning. Make them niche ... and give them curiousity-piquing titles. Be funny, be clever. Be precise. Be particular. When I say niche I mean don't just have "art" - subdivide it into genres, artists. I recommend mixing it up between specific genres, like spirals, peacocks, full moon, sumptuous cakes and more compilation type story boards, like Woman of the Woods, In the Red Tent...

2) Make gorgeous board covers. People will TOTALLY judge your pins by your cover. Pick your most favourite pin. Which works cropped to cover size. To do this, on your profile page hover over a board cover, then click on "Edit board cover" press the arrows to go through the possibilities, click and move the image to centre it as you want it.

3) Be a curator. Imagine your Pinterest boards as a museum. Or be an editor, imagine them as a magazine. Rearrange your boards to walk people through them in a way that makes sense. Some choose to group them alphabetically by title. I choose to have my most popular at the top, and then group by similar interst, so I have all my craft ones together, all my recipes together. Cos the chances are if someone's into cakes, they'll probably be into pies and donuts too. But they might hate moon time. This way I keep them near what they want.

Handy hint:To move your boards, at the top of your profile page next to "Edit profile" is a picture of a computer monitor with two arrows. Hover over it and it'll say "rearrange boards". Click this, it'll go red. Click and drag. And then click that button to save. Save regularly, if you move off this page all your hard work will be lost. I speak from experience!

4) Follow people who have similar boards. This means that their feeds feed into your personal fee, so you get lots of what you love and little general stuff that you don't. To get into your personal feed press the Pinterest logo in the top centre of the page. This alone will make your Pinterest experience infinitely more fun and beautiful. On this page, on the lefthand sidebar you will see the "recent activity" column. Here you'll see who's repinning and following you recently. You can click through to any of them.

How else do you find people to follow? When you repin a pin, a little box flashes up telling you another board that it is pinned to as well. This is a great filter. You can either click follow right then and there, or click on their name to go through to check out their boards. Do this!!!

Handy hint: Every image, (unless it is "uploaded by user") is linked to a website. To get to the website click on the image, and then when it opens up in a separate window click on that image and it will take you there. 

5) Choose carefully!! When you are choosing people to follow, go to their profile page, focus on those who have less than 800 followers, as they will still get email notifications and will notice you pop up in their control panel. They will then come and check out your boards, see you are a kindred spirit, follow you, and a beautiful Pinterest love affair is born! If you follow Pinners with massive (usually bought) followings, they will NOT follow you back.

REMEMBER, you can follow individual boards rather than follow a Pinner. Just follow what you love!

6) Make a good profile page. Put up a nice pic of yourself, share a few words that tell people about your interests and passions. Share your blog/ website.

7)  Pinterest etiquette: don't pin 50 things on one board on one go, it puts people off and they will unfollow. So mix it up.

Handy hint - In the past, every pin went out onto the main boards, now only one pin every eight hours goes onto them, so the more followers you have,the more possible repins. Why does this matter? Platform building... and ego boosts!

8) Get techie!! Go to to "About" menu in the Pinterest header, and select the second option from the drop down menu "Pin It button". This gives you lots of goodies:

• A "pin marklet" to download onto your browser's navigation bar to make adding new pins easy as pie.  Then whatever website/ blog you are on when you're going about your daily websurfing, you hit that button and it will show you all available images to pin, and opens your boards straight up.
• Apps for i phone and i pad
• Badges to add to your blog/website so people can follow you easily.

9) Upload good quality new pins from other sites, label them well - with the name of the artist/ author/ website and a few key words. Places like foodgawker and etsy are great places to get new images from. Do not upload images from google image searches, this is a rookie mistake. Be sure you link direct to the original site. Introducing original images will get you out there and get lots of repins with your name

10) Be wary of group boards. If you follow them you will be bombarded with lots of mediochre pins, and the occasional bit of spam advertising too.

11) Change your email notification settings. Do this. You do NOT want to know every time someone repins a pin. But it's great to know when you get new followers.

12) Share your boards on Facebook, Twitter and your blog, especially in groups! If people don't know you have boards, they won't know to follow them!!

13) Pin regularly. The more you pin, the more you get the hang of it, and the more repins you get.

Hope this helps! Do share your pinterest accounts below! And follow me!

The 12 books that rocked my 2012

So I've had a few comments and emails asking for another post on books. Seems you know I love 'em, and want to know what I've been reading and what I recommend.

My problem is I read so much, both for my writing work, reviewing for JUNO magazine and for pleasure. I love to talk about books. But having to sit down and write pithy little reviews that convey my true feelings about them, I find... ummm..... dull. And obviously I can't reproduce my JUNO reviews here before they're in the magazine

Which is sad really, because I fully intended to do a monthly book slot on here. It might yet happen.

So, books that rocked my 2012. They were a funny old mix. Some new releases. Some older. All non-fiction, but of course! Here they are!

I Thought it Was Just Me (But It Isn't) - Brene Brown 
This is an incredible book. A must read for all women (Mummy, I'm getting you a copy for your birthday!) Brown has been an academic researcher into the subject of shame, especially in women, for a number of years. Her book is deep, totally readable and will make a lot of lightbulbs go off in your brain. I am eagerly anticipating her latest book Daring Greatly when it comes out in paperback in the UK.

Mama Gena's School of Womanly Arts 
This came out a few years ago now. I avoided it like the plague - pink boas and womanly arts were not for me then. I was aware that there had been a major disagreement between editors at JUNO over this one, so I steered clear. But actually I really enjoyed it. It's all about how to get your feminine mojo going - I wouldn't agree with everything in it, quite a bit comes from the "women should use their feminine wiles to manipulate men" school of thought. But when she's not on that track, I'm totally with her.

Aphrodite's Daughters: Women's Sexual Stories and the Journey of the Soul - Jalaja Bonheim
OK, I've noticed that more than half the list has to do with sex. La-la! I read a lot of books on sex, birth, creativity and the soul - really it's all the same thing. This is a book I've re read a couple of times over the past two years. It's like Women who Run with the Wolves meets The Vagina Monologues. I like!

Red Velvet and Chocolate Heartache - Harry Eastwood
My favourite cookery book of the year. It's a cake book. But with a twist. Gluten-free, butter-free, gooey, yummy cakes and divine pictures. See my baking blog for a long review.

Sacred Economics - Charles Eisenstein.
I reviewed this for a feature for JUNO on 'books to change the world' in the forthcoming Spring issue. It is high brow, but very clearly written and superbly researched. A fascinating read on how we can make money sacred again. It's changed my perspective totally.

I Sit Listening to the Wind - Judith Duerk
The second in the Circle of Stones series. This didn't make much of an impact on me the first time I read it, but this time round it was rich and full. It's all about the impact of a woman's overdeveloped masculine side and how it impacts her. Highly recommended.

Vagina: A New Biography - Naomi Wolf. OK this is a contentious one. It has created a feminist fire storm. It's a little bitty, perhaps a little flaky. But it's got lots of great stuff in it which gave me many "aha" moments. It was a real page turner. And opened my eyes. Like did you know that there are men, and women who get paid serious money to do "sacred yoni massage!? They look you in the eyes, say, "welcome goddess", they give you a toe tingling orgasm, you pay them £150, and it's nothing to do with sex, really?!?!?!

Manhood - Steve Biddulph. My husband borrowed this from a friend, and he loved it so much he's getting his own copy. Which I'm delighted by, because I started reading it in the car on the way to their house and got totally hooked - admittedly it was on the bit on men and sex. I lvoe Steve Biddulph - he strikes me as a very honest, caring, compassionate man, parent and teaccher, and has a lot of insight into masculinity in the modern age.

The Mandala Book - I love this book. It's a visual sourcebook for me. As is Celtic Art - George Bain - which I teaching myself to draw Celtic knots and designs from. These are a great form of meditation. I have tried reading a couple of books of Celtic history and culture which were dreadfully written, am looking for recommendations.

Moods of Motherhood - Lucy Pearce
You know when you make yourself cry, and laugh out loud, and it's your life that you're reading, your words, then it must be pretty good really! haven't promoted this book that much. But if you like the blog, then do get the book. It's got the best bits of the blog, my JUNO columns, a number of JUNO articles and chapters that I've contributed to other books, and lots of original pieces too.

And still.... You Can Heal Your Life -Louise L Hay.
I come back to it every few weeks. I've copied out a number of the long affirmations and am considering learning them to recite, like prayers. This is as close to a bible as I get.

What have been your favourite books of 2012? Are there any coming out in 2013 that you're eagerly anticipating? Do share!

Hairy guacamole, Batman!

So there I was, sitting in a bath of vegetable blobs when I thought, maybe this is not such a good idea.

If I had a penis I would have just poured myself a tequila half an hour ago. Because a man, if he sees a bowl of guacamole, would never in a million years consider putting it on his hair, just like if he sees oatmeal and honey, he thinks "breakfast" not "cheap tonifying face mask."

But here I was. Penis free. Hair down to my boobs, which is fecking long when your boobs are down to your knees. Having not been to a hairdresser in 8 years. And having spent the past two days and nights sleeping with it up to minimise the chundered carrot chunks in it, (I had the vomitting bug), something needed to be done. And so I decided two things.

My poor dear body needs some real TLC. I'm worth it. A truly good decision, I was on the money here.

The next one: I'll start with my hair - not so good!

I went to the internet for an answer. We had an avocado on the turn in the fruit bowl, and my addled thrifty mama brain remembered seeing on Pinterest (the mama fantasy world) that one can use such things for DIY hair deep conditioning treatments.

I bundled the kids off with a blender full of freshly made hummous (its alright, there's no need to hate me, its the only thing they all eat other than their subsistence diet of chocolate spread sandwiches) with dear Mr DA to see the in-laws and ran myself a bath.

Then I set to work on the hair mask. Ah, blender with kids, I realised. No worries, reassures the glossy website, just mash well, and mix in the olive oil.

Well I did, really well. And that's where I shoulda stopped and cracked open the tequila and tortilla chips.

But no, I stepped on the scales, celebrated the lost chundered pounds, lit some candles, said prayers and lowered myself into the bath. Shampooed, rinsed, applied mask. Rinsed. And rinsed. And rinsed again. And then spent the next ten minutes picking out lumps of guacamole from my dry yet oily, tangled, shitty-looking, weird-smelling hair.

So if you see me, and it looks like I have puke in my hair, I just might, or I might have just been on Pinterest again.

Now there's a man back home, and a freshly-bathed wife in a dressing gown, and no kids....though I doubt I'll get lucky, with all these smelly green lumps in my hair!

So pass the guacamole. And the tortilla chips. And the scissors!

Tell me dear reader, in the spirit of Blog delurking week, what's the weirdest thing you've ever put on your hair... Or skin? And did it work. If you've never left a message before, I'd be extra stoked to hear from you! I know you're there!