Thursday, October 3, 2013

Dear Blogger...12 Reasons Why I Don't Comment on Your Blog

Hey there,

I've been reading you for ages... but we've never met.

You've made me laugh till the wee ran down my legs. You've made me cry, big bawling snotty sobs, sending me to bed with a racing head and aching heart. You've made me feel seen, and not so strange. You've added new words and concepts to my vocabulary. Your kids have made me feel jealous with their general cuteness. Your links have lead me to information that has changed my life.

You have held my heart in your hands... even though I have never even said hello.

I always mean to, and want to...

It's just...

1) I'm an introvert, and not very good at making small talk and so I never know what to say in response...
2) I feel silenced by the magnitude of wonder I have just absorbed from you and my words all dried up.
3) I always feel like I'm not part of your inner circle, so my comment doesn't matter. You and your cyber pals are like SO cliquey.
4) Lots of other people have already said what I was going to say. My piffling comment is redundant in this sea of adulation, interspersed with the occasional troll - WHY does everyone always bait the troll... WTF, are they INSANE? That is SO bitchy...
5) I'm busy, busy, busy... no time!
6) I tried, and the fucking secret codes and password and demands that I type out blurry numbers  made me lose my shite. I am NOT a fucking spambot, just believe me! I don't want to comment THAT much! Who are you, President of the fucking world? Not even SHE has this much fucking security!
7) I commented. A long heartfelt comment. And it just disappeared into cyber space. I'll be fucked if I'm going to write it all out again.
8) HOW do you comment, any way?
9) Comments are just SO 2003.
10) Shhh, I don't want anyone to know I'm reading this!
11) Bloggers aren't real... so why comment?
12) I HATE YOU! (this is what we Bloggers believe when our posts are met with silence - we are very sensitive types!)

This goes out to all the bloggers whose blogs I love, but have never commented on - one or more apply to each! Renegade Mothering, Momastery, Finding Joy, Unabashedly Female, Heather Plett, Parenting with Crappy Pictures... and so many more!

Hey you, silent reader, I dare you, tell me which number applies to you! I don't have any horrible secret codes to get past!

12 comments:

  1. Number 3, mostly! Loved this - and I almost never comment (anywhere) but I'd love to do so a bit more ;) And sometimes number 1. I'm an introvert, anyway. Oh, and number 4!

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    1. Honestly, I have NO IDEA why this published as 'Your Higher Self'. Shows how often I comment - it's the name of a private blog I started months ago and obviously I've done something daft and changed the name of my profile. Argh! It's Maria Kayumi from Leonie's ABLA :)

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  2. hahahaha! Thanks for being here Maria! I like getting messages from My Higher Self!!!

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  3. Oh God where do I start? 5, 6, 7 & 8. No 6 ages me by about 10 years! Great post.

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  4. I have another one: that I am holding the iPad over my head reading the posts while a child swings at it, trying to grab it and I am holding him back with a leg and a spare hand....

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    1. Mine is more, I have to hold the i pad firmly with two hands or the children will grab it if I dare to use only one!

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  5. I have another one: I blog with Wordpress and you blog with blogger and it is an extra step to make WP work properly with blogger and it sometimes doesn't work at all with an iPad. Love your stuff, Lucy. Love it!

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  6. Oh, yes, yes, yes, TOTALLY forgot that one, Molly! (and thank you xx)

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  7. 6, 7, 4, and 1! I especially hate it when I've written a thoughtful comment out on my phone (tiny screen, annoying autocorrect, etc) and then it gets lost in the rigamarole of captcha, etc. Ack! But I love getting comments on my blog posts, and I know everyone else loves it too. <3

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