The palm of god

Regular readers of this blog will know these two  things about me:
a) I do not subscribe to a particular religion
b) I write quite a lot about god

So it is with those provisos in place that I want to write about ... the palm of god.

I do not believe in an anthropomorphic god. My god has neither arms nor legs nor head. And yet.... Like the moment in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, when Zaphod Beeblebrox is put into the Total Perspective Vortex, the palm of god image takes me out of the driving seat, out of importance, very small and unimportant, and into perspective in a very freeing way.

The idea for this comes from the vast gold and bronze Buddhas I saw in my travels in Thailand and Japan - thirty, or forty feet high they dwarf our humanity our small fears and worries which seem so big and all-consuming to us, and instead present a calm, all-seeing benevolence.

Close your eyes. Imagine, if you will, that you are curled in a foetal position, calm and relaxed. Whatever is worrying you starts to drift out of your head, and as you open your eyes, what was darkness and worry, now you see pure, shimmering gold all around you. Rather than a hard, cold world, rather than problems and people cramming in at you from all sides, instead you are lying alone, at peace, in the soft golden warmth of an enormous hand that cradles your body like a precious baby. You are safe, supported, warm and loved. The worries are not yours, they drift off into the vastness of infinity. You are just a tiny drop, a beloved being, cradled and safe in the hand of god. All is well.

Finding Form: a meditative guide to creating Random Acts of Beauty

I went into the woods, wanting to make something. And blanked. Fancy images from Andy Goldsworthy flashed before my eyes. But here I was, a mama, with a helpful nearly-three-year-old on foot and a fractious teething, just-turned-one-year-old in a buggy. And half an hour to spare before I had to collect my husband from the doctors. So it had to be quick, simple and I wanted it to be seasonal. Oh, and it's going to go on a blog... And my friend is coming down tomorrow to hunt for it...panic... stage fright...blank...

Breathe. Look around. Walk with your eyes open...

So I did. This is like beginner's mind in meditation. Always start again with beginner's mind: open to all possibilities, to the joy of everything.

And that's when I saw the catkins. Lots and lots of them. Little shaggy fairy lambs tails. In acid yellow, ochre and brown. I started to gather them.

THE SOUND OF SILENCE

I always thought that I was drawn to Buddhism and Quakerism because they were non-dogmatic routes to personal enlightenment. They speak to my own journey, by elucidating and honouring the individual's inner path.

This morning I suddenly realised why else they draw me - they both offer silence as both ministry and communion. Silence for me is a balm and a discipline. It does not come easily. I have a chattering mind and mouth, but silence is where I am happiest. And with three young children it is a commodity as rare as gold in my life.

I remember when I did a ten day silent meditation retreat in Japan, everyone who knew me thought I would struggle with not being able to talk for ten days. The opposite was true, I ran to the toilet and sobbed my heart out when the silence came to an end and I had to speak again.

Silent space practices

Meditation per se is not something I have space for in my life right now. And I feel the lack of it. And so I take opportunities throughout the day to try to reconnect to silence and mindfulness, that I want to share with you.

Metta meditation of loving kindness

Thank you for the support and interest in our circle of Deep Compassion. I know of two other circles and many individuals who will be joining us. I have already started receiving cards which I am compiling to give to the mother in mourning. (Please see my previous post for more information)

Yesterday I baked a rosemary remembrance cake with love, which we will eat after the circle. Rosemary has a history of being used for funerals, and to clear the mind. (For the recipe see Nigella Lawson's Feast)

We will be practicing a Metta meditation at the women's circle.  This is a Buddhist way of developing loving kindness and deep compassion. First we start with ourselves, which is often deeply challenging, before opening it out to those we love, those we do not know, those for whom we have challenging feelings, and then all beings.

I first practised this in Japan, in the mountains near Kyoto, on a ten day, silent Vipassana meditation retreat. We also did it at our wedding ceremony. It is a very powerful, yet simple meditation, to be recited aloud or in your head. I found this version which was composed after another tragic incident, and thought it appropriate.

A Metta Meditation
For the tragedy in NYC, DC & PA of September 11, 2001

May I be well, safe and peaceful.
May I be free from the suffering of fear, anger and ill will.
May I find forgiveness for the inevitable harms we bring to one another.
May I cultivate lovingkindness, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity.
May I live in peace and harmony with all beings.


May our families and friends be well, safe and peaceful.
May they be free from the suffering of fear, anger and ill will.
May they find forgiveness for the inevitable harms we bring to one another.
May they cultivate lovingkindness, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity.
May they live in peace and harmony with all beings.


May all other persons in our lives be well, safe and peaceful.
May they be free from the suffering of fear, anger and ill will.
May they find forgiveness for the inevitable harms we bring to one another.
May they cultivate lovingkindness, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity.
May they live in peace and harmony with all beings.


May all the victims of this tragedy and their families be well, safe and peaceful.
May they be free from the suffering of fear, anger and ill will.
May they find forgiveness for the inevitable harms we bring to one another.
May they cultivate lovingkindness, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity.
May they live in peace and harmony with all beings.


May those responsible for this tragedy and their families be well, safe and peaceful.
May they be free from the suffering of fear, anger and ill will.
May they find forgiveness for the inevitable harms we bring to one another.
May they cultivate lovingkindness, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity.
May they live in peace and harmony with all beings.
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May all beings be well, safe and peaceful.
May they be free from the suffering of fear, anger and ill will.
May they find forgiveness for the inevitable harms we bring to one another.
May they cultivate lovingkindness, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity.
May they live in peace and harmony with all beings.