My tangled passion

Howdy gang, sorry for the silence - I've been on my holidays. Barcelona and the foothills of the Pyrenees, dontcha know!! I took two books, and read a grand total of 8 pages - so what did I spend my time doing, apart from visiting aquariums, underground river trips, swimming in mountain rivers... ? Well, I discovered a new passion - tangling...

For those of you who haven't come across it: "Zentangles are a new trend in the drawing and paper arts world. The concept was started by Rick Roberts and Maria Thomas as a way to practice focus and meditation through drawing, by using repetitive lines, marks, circles, and shapes. Each mark is called a "tangle," and you combine various tangles into patterns to create "tiles" or small square drawings."

I got totally hooked doing 2, then 3 then 4 a day. And my kids saw me doing them. And asked if they could try. And they got hooked too.

I've always wanted to be a doodler - I love patterns, and mandalas and henna and paisley. I loved them, I wanted to do them... but I didn't know how to start... I kept doing the same again and again. This book has been a wonderful step by step guide and teacher - I am really chuffed with what I have achieved in just two weeks. And have a new passion - and am excited about taking it in new directions in my own art....

And I find it so soothing and therapeutic to do. Like meditation - but I get great art to keep at the end. Win-win.

I'm aware that Zentangling is a bit passe for US readers, but it's totally new to me here in the time warp of Ireland. I'm thinking of getting a copy for the two doodling women in my life. So that's why I'm sharing it with y'all here. Are you a doodler? Do you Zentangle?  Got any great resources to share? I've got a new Pinterest board on them - but of course!

Kitchen Alchemy of a Yummy Mummy

When I'm feeling sad and blue.
Or just don't know what to do. 

I step up to the hob, my pans a-gleaming

Setting them going bubbling and steaming

Roasts and risolles, soups and stew

Frying, grinding, braising too

Spices and herbs to heal my woes

Garlic on fingers, chilli in my nose.

As I stir and pans a-simmer

I feel so hope begin to glimmer

The kitchen alchemy, with its rising steam

Stifles out my shouts and screams.

Onions are chopped, eggs beating, 

Straining, boiling, whisking, heating.

Cake or curry, pizza or jam

Elegant quiches from leftover ham.

What I cook matters less than the meaning it brings - 

Its warmth and its love to make my soul sing.

I let off my steam,  and feed my tummy

And I'm back to being a yummy mummy.

The Sacred Role of a Parent

A lot of the time I worry "am I doing enough with our children"? In the bigger picture sense, things like: are they turning into good people? How much should they know about sex? Are they getting enough life experience?  What if they don't have any spiritual practices. You know, small fry stuff like that which swirls round most parents' heads most days.

But even more frequently I think: "now what are we going to do?"

Like. We've got 3 hours till Mr DA gets home. They're bored. I don't have the energy to do anything creative or practical with them. It's raining. WTF are we going to DO to survive the next three hours without mass slaughter?!!!

When, as I was preparing to lead our women's group on Sunday, a lightning bolt struck that I just have to share with you.

That there are only, truly two things I need to do as a mother.

To find my own centre. 

And to hold the space.

End of!

Truly!

(Now this is the embarrassing bit where having bigged it up, you're like "durgh! of course, Lucy!") But I've started so I'll finish!

Sure, we all know, on one level that being a "good" parent is nothing about the amount of playdough or painting or nature walks we do with them. We know it in theory, but many of us don't know it on a gut level, in a way that informs our every day decisions.

That is why this revelation was nothing short of a bolt of lightning from the blue. It united a number of previous observations I have made in the science lab of extreme parenting - otherwise known as in my daily life.

So, I notice that when I am below par, tired or ill, that the children go all jangly - as though they can no longer feel their energy being held by me, and so they are pushing the boundaries on every side to try and find where they are, to feel safe. This is the unseen work of parenting, but that which really counts. We can't really SEE when it's being done, but it is really obvious in its effects when it's not.

The equations go something like this...
Mama sick = mad kids. Mama tired = evil kids. Mama happy = happy families.

This is why self care is so important. It's not just feelgood twentieth century mumbo jumbo. It directly contributes to the wellbeing of the entire family.

Holding space takes energy. Concentrated energy, for those of us who are not, this year at least, fully enlightened beings.

Sometimes holding our centre in the midst of the mundane is a lot trickier than in crisis, when the choice is more stark: hold your centre or freak out.

There are times when I know that holding my centre was all I can do. With Aisling's fall. In birth. With other of the children's injuries and illnesses. With many tantrums. Finding my centre. Allowing myself to remain there as everything goes on. As fear and sadness and anger and despair, and not knowing what to do swirl around me.

By holding the space I mean being really, deeply present, emotionally there. Not adding any emotional stuff to the party. Being as pure and transparent and there in the moment as is humanly possible. Being totally there for them. Being responsive, flexible, breath by breath.

Holding the space often means physically holding too. Just holding, not fixing, not clinging. Just body to body, heart to heart, offering the comfort of your presence.

And when I can keep my centre, I can hold the space, breath by breath - hold it so that everyone else feels safe to be the way that life is making them at that moment - then I am doing my sacred job as mother. I am being their womb space, their soft place to fall, their mothersoul, their advocate.  I am there, completely, for them. 

But when I am off centre, I cannot do this. When I am tired, overwhelmed, anxious then I react. I am pulled into the emotional storm. Or I am trying to escape - mentally physically.

Life has been hard with tantrums and sick kiddies these past weeks.

Sometimes I find my centre, and hold the space, and fulfill my sacred role in a way that I am proud to call myself their mother.

And often I don't. And I feel shame and regret.

But now I know, in really simple terms, what it is I am aiming at, it makes it seem more doable.

And perhaps it will for you too!

Big love and rainbows coming at you!

Lucy
x

The end of the world is nigh - what are your plans?

Yup, that's right, the end of the world is a matter of days away.

Winter solstice - 21/12/12

What are your plans? Do you have your bunker prepared? Or are you going to be dancing naked on top of a Mayan pyramid in the depths of the jungle? (Like my sister - well, she's going to a hippy conventions in Mexico, so I presume that's what they'll be doing!) Will you be on the road to see family and friends for Christmas (like some of my friends). Will you be visiting a sacred site like Newgrange or Stonehenge (like my friend Tracy.) Or will you just be settling down in front of the telly with a glass of Pinot? (Like my dad!)

Me? I was very excited to be invited to hold the space for a fire labyrinth in West Cork at a solstice ceremony complete with drumming circle. It seems like a magical and meaningful way to celebrate with my whole family and a community of others. As you will see from my post next week for the Carnival of Natural Parenting, this aligns perfectly with my intentions right now. So we will probably not be naked, bearing in mind the climate here, but we will be mindful and present for the Shift.

For the WHAT? I hear you ask. The Shift. Check out what I wrote about it earlier this year when the movement launched.

Mayans or no Mayans - things are shifting everywhere on every level - few could deny it. I love the idea of celebrating it, and of giving our conscious positive energy towards it. Because so often these changes in climate, economy, health and culture can feel stressful and worrying, and we feel out of control, like we are being shifted against our will. This is a way of stepping into that power and committing to conscious co-creation. I am writing a lot about it at the moment, in a feature for JUNO for the Spring issue, and in my book, The Rainbow Way. Co-creation is where it's at people. Getting ourselves into that place can be a challenge as we want to control or we want to not be in control.Ceremony and ritual are a great way to practice this balance.

If you're looking for inspiration and events, the Birth 2012 movement are planning events around the word.  The most captivating, for me, is the 1 billion OMs (or AUMs - depending on your sacred spelling preference!) you can join in wherever you are, changing the frequency of the world by chanting this sacred sound -I just love the idea of this sound travelling around the world, time zone after time zone. They are asking people to take a pledge:

"I commit to only share
words and actions of love on
December 20, 21, and 22, 2012"

It sounds like a great commitment to make, at this time of goodwill to all men. Even if you think the rest of it is a bunch of hokum!

So whether you believe that the end of the world is nigh, a shift in consciousness is happening - either by chance or design, whether you're celebrating the darkness day and the turn towards the light, do please let us know what you're up to, and why! Lets inspire each other.

P.S. Have you signed up to the mailing list? You can do it right here to get a fortnightly round up of my favourite posts, links, special offers and events.

It's nothing personal!

I like to think that I'm a unique individual. Whilst I give a certain amount of credit to my parents for all my bad bits (!!), I tend to believe that my hope and dreams are very personal. My flaws and foibles mine to erase (and feel badly about). My glories, mine to celebrate. I think we all do. In a culture which does not have ancestoral worship and which deifies the individual, we tend to try to distance ourselves from our families, from our lineage. We have lost a sense of perspective of ourselves as being a ring in the tree of our family's life, in a great forest.

Yesterday I read the first draft of my father's autobiography and I was humbled. Perhaps for the first time I really felt my place in the flow of life, my position in a family line which lives through me. I have always known in my head what my grandparents and parents were interested in, the work they did, the values that drove them, but to see it written out, I felt the stream of life that courses through the years, pulling us all along with it, in such sharp relief. For perhaps the first time, I lost my sense of them and me, and really felt the "us" of our family. The spirit that expresses itself through us all, generation after generation, each doing our bit, playing our part, being unique, and yet part of the same strong flow.

I never really felt this, because I never knew them. My grandmother, Lucy Helen, for whom I was named, died seven years before I was born. My grandfather was ill and barely knew me and my father doesn't talk a huge amount about them.

I see the books running through our veins, our love of the written word, our need to drink in the progressive ideas of others, and then live it out. And our love of good food, learning, creativity, mindfulness and beauty. It's all there. Generation after generation. Our vocations calling us, demanding to be lived through us, an incessant urge which has made us dance our lives to its tune.

My grandmother was a teacher of the most progressive kind, a free thinking educationalist who helped to found and run The Peckham Experiment, a revolutionary approach to family health, wellbeing and education which influenced the founding of the NHS. And of course she wrote a book on it! A career woman first, she had her first (living) child when she was 43.  My grandfather, like his father before him, was a printer by trade and antiquarian bookshop owner. Their bookshelves, in rural Ireland of the 1950s were full of Sufism, cutting edge educational tracts, and mysticism.

It feels wonderful to get this perspective, of the tides that course through us. This combined with other insights that I have had this week, makes it all a lot less personal - my life, my work. All I need to do is play my part in the dance, not stress or worry. The spirit that moved my ancestors, moves me too. It's nothing personal!

Embracing the Magic of Moonlit Nights

Welcome to the July Mindful Mama Carnival: Mindfulness and Nature
This post was written for inclusion in the Mindful Mama Carnival hosted by Becoming Crunchy and TouchstoneZ. This month our participants have shared their experiences of mindfulness and the natural world. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
***
I remember the first time I really saw the stars. 

I was seven, visiting my cousins in America - and the summer sky seemed alive with a million twinkling dots, awe inspiring in their infinitude. The moon floated in glory and I felt so full of life. Amazed that I had never really seen the night sky. 

As a child the night was for being inside, for bedtime. I wasn't afraid of the dark, but nor was I shown its majesty.

And as an adult I seem to continue this pattern. As the darkness falls we retreat inside into our own cosy cocoons, forgetting the celestrial display of the skies above our heads. The nightly reminder of our position in the universe and the beauty of nature, of our precarious position on a tiny spinning globe of rock dancing amongst millions of others, of the pure chance or design, whichever your belief, of the very existence of life itself, let alone our own individual lives.  


And so I commit to two things this summer to bring the night into our lives. 
The first is to bring our children out and lie on our backs and look up at the stars. Just to be and to see.

And the second is to celebrate the full moon with other women every month. 

Since making the connection between the moon and my cycles when writing my book  Moon Time: A guide to celebrating your menstrual cycle,
I now find that I really feel the lack of the full moon in my life if I miss it one month. I find the full moon energising, illuminating even.

And I have, for a whole host of reasons, missed it now for a few months in a row. As a result my cycle shifted totally and my energy seemed to sink. 
  

A few months back a couple of friends and I met down on the beach on the full moon and did a gentle mindfulness ceremony - breathing in, feeling the sand beneath our feet, the wind in our hair, washing away the past month and visioning the new, blessing ourselves and each other (via a mama water fight!!) with an icy cold ocean blessing. The moon hid herself that night, but we all left the beach feeling connected to each other, ourselves and our place in the universe. Revitalised and invigorated from being together, from taking time for ourselves, in nature and with sisters.

So I am calling out to all mindful mamas far and near, to mark the full moon in whatever way speaks to you.

(You will notice that there are TWO full moons in August. This is a Blue Moon  -  the second full moon in a given month, this gives rise to the phrase "once in a blue moon" as it is very rare to have two full moons in a month!)

You might choose to:

• make and walk a labyrinth on the beach,
• light a bonfire and dance around it, 
• lie on the grass on your back, 
• sing together in harmony,
• go for a walk with your lover, 
• breathe mindfully by yourself, 
• pick flowers for yourself by moonlight,
• have a bubble bath by moonlight.

Do something that fills you with light.

I am making a commitment to myself, and all women in my local area to be out on our local beach, Shanagarry strand at moon rise for every full moon of the year from now on. Please do join me, spread the word - it would be so exciting for it to grow every month!

Resources:
Moon Time: a guide to celebrating your menstrual cycle - Lucy H Pearce
The Stargazers Handbook: an atlas of the night sky - Giles Sparrow
Earth Child - Games Stories, Activities, Experiments and Ideas about Living Lightly on Planet Earth - Kathryn Sheehad, and Mary Waidner
The Green Hour - Todd Christopher
http://www.moonphases.info

***

***
Visit The Mindful Mama Homepage to find out how you can participate in the next Mindful Mama Carnival!
On Carnival day, please follow along on Twitter using the handy #MindMaCar hashtag. You can also subscribe to the Mindful Mama Twitter List and Mindful Mama Participant Feed.
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

• Zen and the Art of Raising Chickens Jenn at Monkey Butt Junction has found a connection to nature in her very own backyard, thanks to her chickens.
• Healing Gemstones and Crystals for Children Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama discusses which genstones and crystals are best used by children to support physical, emotional, and/or spiritual healing.
• A Gardener’s Meditation Andrea at Tales of Goodness shares how she finds peace and renewal through gardening.
• Weeding My Thoughts Amanda at Let’s Take the Metro discusses how nature keeps her in the moment and stops her endless stream of thoughts.
• Grounded in Nature Rani at OmSheSaid shares her walk in nature, and through expressive words, shares this journey to coming home.
• Embracing the Magic of Moonlit Nights Lucy at Dreaming Aloud shares ways to embrace the magic of moonlit nights with your children and as a woman.
• Meditation for a Mindful Mama Alinka at Baby Web guides you through her research on the science of meditation, its numerous benefits, and presents to you a life changing meditation exercise.
• The Wild Within Naturemummy at Motherhood: My Latest Adventure reflects on the soothing qualities of wild places.
• Nature’s Lessons in Mindfulness Tat at Mum in Search wants to bring the same mindfulness that comes so easily in nature to her relationships.
• On Manicured Nature: We Roam in Small Spaces Featherstory at The Aniweda Dream shares her gratitude for her limited natural settings and her plans to expand her children's experience with the natural world.
• Garden (Time Out) Meditation Do you ever need a time out for yourself? Amy at Anktangle finds that during a difficult parenting moment, taking pause to spend a few minutes outside is just the thing she needs to be able to experience renewed patience, focus, and energy.
• Nature Makes Me a Better Mother Terri at Child of the Nature Isle could not imagine parenting without Mother Nature.
• The Healing Power of Sunshine Karen at Playful Planet shares her experiences of reneweal in the natural world.
• Natural History Kenna at A Million Tiny Things gets out into nature, 200 years ago, and isn't sure she likes it there.
• Nurtured by Nature Darcel at The Mahogany Way shares with us how being in nature helps her feel centered and connected.
• Mindfulness and Nature Zoie at TouchstoneZ explores the connection between mindfulness and the natural world.
• A Sense of Awe and Wonder Kelly at Becoming Crunchy shares the feeling she never fails to get from the natural world and how it guides her to the mindfulness she craves.

7 Top money resources for creative entrepreneurs

"When a deer drinks from a stream, the earth does not weep at the loss of
water. The value is cyclical. The earth is thankful for the deer, the deer is
thankful for the water. And the stream keeps flowing."

Tara Gentile, The Art of Earning

image: www.holidaysinsrilanka.com

And so, to the final post of my Mindful Money series.

What great feedback I've had from so many of you  on the Mindful Money series. Thank you all for reading and sharing, I'm glad it's been food for thought, and helpful to you. If you have missed any of the series, there is a list at the end of this post so you can catch up!

Do know that whilst I am philosophising about it here, I am still very much learning to put it into action now myself. I ebb and flow in my levels of confidence or cowardice. But I am learning. Slowly!

I know of so many women and men starting businesses right now, turning their passions into something they can make money from. Whether you are selling your wares at a market, your services, or establishing a more professional platform for your business, I think getting right about money - what to charge, how to cover your costs and time, and feel good about making a profit - is the biggest challenge on the road. Once you find peace with the money side of business, everything else falls into place.

" Our relationship with our money is directly

connected to our relationship with our

creativity." 

 Tara Gentile - The Art of Earning

The money freak-out thang is like a log damming up the river, once it's gone, everything else flows. After all, you're in business doing what you love, with passion and integrity. You want to be of service, to make a difference, to bring joy and love into people's lives - so the customer service aspect and the product aspect are there already to a degree - all you have to do is get confident in sharing your work with the world - and then taking right payment for it.

Oh it's so easy in black and white - but such a challenge in reality.

That's why there are a whole lot of people, some who have had great success in online business, and many, many self-styled prosperity coaches out there who want to HELP you, FOR A FEE!!! Many are cashing in on our insecurity, promising what they can't - and don't - deliver. I am always a little suspicious of people who make money out of telling other people how to make money!! They tend to be the ones who charge high prices, just to prove that they're worth it. A lot of them BUY their own ego bullshit.

I have done a lot of investigating, sampling and reading. I have found a number of products and e courses out there with major hype, and major prices (the Spark e course is one, at $150 for an ebook? Seriously?)

Here are my pick of the crop. Some free, some paid - but ALL offer SOME great free resources. I have used them all myself, though not necessarily for the prices they sell for (I got a number of them from the great 72 hour bundle deal I was talking about earlier this month).

But before you spend REMEMBER this: NO ONE CAN DO IT FOR YOU! They can give you tools, systems, flashes of insight, and methods for blasting through blocks - but the courage, the action, the application - is all YOURS!

So my top picks:

1) Leonie Dawson's Business e course. I found her e-book the single most useful tool in kickstarting my blogging, writing,online business, and selling my art. The e-course version, with built in support and feedback  is starting  on June 1st. She's also giving away a free e-book at the moment which has many handy biz and money tips and tricks which is well worth getting your hands on!

2) The $100 Start Up - a great new book from Chris Guillebeau. Highly readable in tone, it shares stories of successful passion based entrepreneurs who started on a shoe string, gleaning wisdom and practical tools from their experiences. I'm really loving it and recommend it very highly. He has a range of courses and e books for our types!

3) Maria Forleo's sassy b school looks seriously good for hands-on practical training in online business. I am really tempted, this year's intake includes a LOT of big names who I follow. But the $1999 fee is more than we have to invest right now. You can still get nuggets of her business insight through the great free videos she does, which I highly recommend.


4) The Art of Earning  is super-good for challenging the stories you tell yourself about money. I'm re-reading it at the moment and it is chock-full of major "AHA!" moments! I love that she sells it as a pay what you can deal.

5) Etsy does a great free blog and newsletters dedicated to pricing, selling and entrepreneurship. This post is great on pricing strategies

6) I'd Rather be in the Studio - is a great practical business e-book for artists and creatives of all colours. Full of very practical advice for setting up systems for getting strong business and money systems in place, building up mailing lists and keeping clients. It is a no bull shit book.

Oh and I have just discovered...

7) Designing an MBA has a great blog on the topic of money, profit, pricing and business for creative entrepreneurs as well as e courses and e books - and if you sign up to her mailing list gives away a great e book for free

Do share your favourite books/ e courses and teachers!

This is part of the Mindful Money series at Dreaming Aloud. Take some time to check out the other posts on...

Naming Your Price

Our Matriarchal Inheritance
The Blessing of Money
Guilt and money
The ugly ducking sells out: Finding my inner entrepreneur
Transformational Teachers
Beyond Money

Beyond money

Welcome back to Mindful Money Week!

One of the ways we can make peace with money is by it taking a less prominent role in our lives, in moving beyond money.

The more you are plugged into the external economy and the outside world, the more cash you need to fulfill your needs. The more self sufficient and plugged into informal money-less economies the less you will need. 

We are all plugged into the external economy to a greater or lesser extent and its impact can be damaging and scary, emotionally and financially for families, especially in these turbulent times.

How can we make our families more resilient, so we can ride the economic rollercoaster with maximum joy and confidence?

The sustainable money circle

1. know how much you have
2. know how much you need
3. know your skills
4. know your networks
5. know your value 
6. set up your income streams
7. do your work
8. collect your income
9. use your income
10. rest and reflect

Guilt doesn't live here any more

I was at a friend's house, admiring a craft book she had received as a gift. She said something which sounded like a foreign language to me. "I feel really guilty every time I see it, I asked for it for my birthday,and someone spent money on it, and I haven't made anything from it."

Perhaps you recognise this feeling? Guilt used to be one of the most pervasive emotions in my life. I felt guilty about everything. But in particular my entire existence and its impact on everyone.

Yes, I had a very strong case of the guilties. Symptoms of which include: apologising for everything all the time, low lying anger and resentment, feeling shit, self flagellation...But I realised in that moment, with exception of my deeply embedded maternal guilt, that guilt does not live here any more.

It was a truly liberating realisation. I had a think about what had changed. And it came to me.

Guilt is a sense of your own unworthiness. It is a blocking, rejecting act. The antidote to guilt is gratitude. It is pretty much impossible to feel guilt if one is grateful for something.

Gratitude is an opening of your hands and heart towards what has been bestowed on you.Gratitude, as I wrote in Wild Sister magazine, is a relatively new practice for me, and it's working magic!

So next time you feel guilty. Take a step back. See yourself shrunken and small and feeling its lack. Then find something to feel grateful for in that situation. And watch the greatest disappearing act of all time: POOF! Your guilt has gone!

The blessing of money

Do you consider yourself blessed?

We live as energetic beings in a body and world of form. To be fully healthy and balanced we cannot deny either part. And yet we do!

Often those of us who walk the path of spirituality, can get to feeling really uncomfortable about the world of form. We feel, or are told, that it is a "lower" realm, of "base" interests, which can trap and defile us. It is our job to transcend it. We must shun money, worldly possessions. We have camels and needles quoted at us ( often by hideously wealthy patriarchs...)

Oh sister, I've been there. And you know what, it's partly true. Ultimately all material things will pass away, you are not your wealth. We humans have the constant ability to confuse who we are with what we do and what we have. but once you have become vigilant of that delusion, the reality is that we are here, living our lives in form.

Money is a part of that world of forms.Shunning it cuts you out of the game, it disempowers your vast potential to do good. You see, if you don't make money, then you're always worrying where the money that you need to live will come from, so all your energy and anxiety goes there, rather than into all the good, all the creative miracles you could be creating in the world.

Name your price

Do you know the Universe's favourite joke?

It's a one liner. Told ad infinitum. Even though I don't seem to find it hugely amusing.See if you recognise it!

This little routine goes something like this:

Me: I want to write a book (teach a course, paint a picture...)

Universe: Great, let's get to it.

Me: Ta -da! Hurray! Get me! I just wrote a book!

Universe: congrats! Now name your price!

Me: But oh, I don't want to make it too expensive, it's not really worth much!

Uni: Great! Name your price!

Me: But I've spent hundreds of hours on it. If I priced it on a per hour basis I'd need to ask for a lot more.

Uni: Great! Name your price!

Me: Look, this is the going rate. I'll charge that.

Uni: Great! Name your price!

Me: But I'm not that good. I'm only starting out.

Uni: Great! Name your price!

Me: OK, this is my price.... (A few minutes/ hours/ days later).... Ummm, no I'm worth more than that!

Uni: Great! Name your price!

Me: Yes! I am going to charge my worth. This is great product. I am a good person. X charges X for theirs, and they are rubbish. Up it goes!

Uni: Great! Name your price!

Me: But then everyone will think I'm greedy. And that it's over priced. They'll see that I'm a sham. They'll feel ripped off. They'll hate me. Yes, that's it, they'll hate me, and they'll tell everyone what a bad person I am. And then no one will buy it. And then we'll never have enough money...

Uni: Great! Name your price!

Do you recognise this?

And so with a mixture of deft research, bravado, self undercutting, guts and terror, weeks of sleepless nights and feeling sick you name your price.

And then the world ends. Everyone hates you. You never work again...

Oh no, scratch that! What really happens is this... Your customer buys, and pays. Or doesn't. They come back. Or perhaps they don't. End of....tell me again where the drama is?!

Mindful money week

This is the introduction to the Mindful Money series at Dreaming Aloud. Take some time to check out the other posts on...

Naming Your Price

Our Matriarchal Inheritance
The Blessing of Money
Guilt
Finding your inner entrepreneur
Transformational Teachers
Beyond Money

WELCOME TO THE MINDFUL MONEY SERIES.

Do you have peace with money? Or does it make you feel uncomfortable when even the thought of it comes up?

Money holds a lot of emotional energy for most of us.

Everywhere I see people struggling with it:

• Those who scorn money and won't admit that they need it, and then get angry at the world because they are struggling. 
• Those who live in enforced deprivation.
• High flying gurus who are cashing in on $1000 an hour coaching fees, flogging over priced products to the desperate,  promising miracles they cannot provide. The spiritual movement seems as guilty of this as pure capitalists.
• The majority of the world who sell their souls for the highest wage they can get, in work that sucks them dry, that they don't believe in.
• Women who when asked to name their price for their work prefer to give it away for free than value themselves.
• The mega rich who squander their wealth.
• Those who use it to manipulate and abuse.

We're in a very unhealthy state about money - as individuals and collectively. 

We scrimp and save, we waste and splurge mindlessly. We borrow what we cannot afford. We undervalue ourselves, then steal to make up the difference. Or we drive too hard a bargain which impoverishes others.

Richness, and poverty are incredibly subjective terms. Many people who are financially wealthy feel they don't have enough.

We are mindless about money. Often it "makes us feel" guilty, angry, greedy, needy. We become obsessed by it. Or try to have nothing to do with it.

What's that all about? Why all the emotion?

Money is just paper, just numbers... or is it? It seems to hold humanity in its thrall.

Money can become our shadow.

Our civilisation is being brought to its knees by our mindlessness to do with money - the banking crises and credit crunch, bankruptcy in nations and individuals.

So this week we're going to spend exploring money - how we make it, how we charge it, how to feel good about it, how to value ourselves, how to move beyond money...

In order to become mindful, we need to be honest. The only way to see a shadow is to shine your light on it and look.

This can feel uncomfortable.

But get this: THEY ARE ONLY FEELINGS. ONLY THOUGHTS.

Yes, really!

So take a deep breath. And let's get to work.

I'm really excited about this!! I vision it as a way that we can support each other in becoming healthy in our earning - and spending. So that we can make our peace with money. So that we can transition to a new sense of value, of economics, of worth in our own lives - which can seed itself into our culture.

This may well become an e course in the future - so consider it a work in progress, which you get to see emerging, for free - and get to contribute to the creation of!

I ask this of you in return - in the spirit of giving and receiving which we are exploring. If what you are reading touches you - please give something in return, whatever feels really good to you - no expectations, no obligation. And absolutely NO guilt!

Giving back could mean ...

• Share the posts whether on Facebook/ Twitter or by email (see the buttons below this post for a quick and easy way) 
• Join the discussion. Add your comments, your questions, your experiences.
• You can support my work financially by donating, buying from The Happy Womb or Etsy, or buying via any of the affiliate links I share on this site.

Thank you...

This is the introduction to the Mindful Money series at Dreaming Aloud. Take some time to check out the other posts on...

Naming Your Price

Our Matriarchal Inheritance
The Blessing of Money
Guilt
Finding your inner entrepreneur
Transformational Teachers
Beyond Money

Mindful mama moon time

Welcome to the March Mindful Mama Carnival: Mindful Mama Challenge
This post was written for inclusion in the Mindful Mama Carnival hosted by Becoming Crunchy and TouchstoneZ. This month our participants have challenges they've set for themselves toward becoming more mindful. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
***
Over the past four years I have become more attuned to my cycles. Over the past year I have become more attuned to the moon's cycles. For the past six months I have been weaving the two together. The impact on my life, and my family's life has been profound.

I started by focusing on the full moon. By absorbing the high energy during my ovulation and retreating at the dark moon. I had the most common "white moon" cycle - bleeding on the dark moon, ovulating on the full moon. At ovulation I knew I would be full of energy from both the moon's phase, and my own hormonal balance. As the moon waned, my mood darkened and I would need to retreat, need to take more time to myself, need to remind myself that I wasn't actually angry at the children, but just pre-menstrual and needing more quiet, more head space. In this way I could be more gentle and loving with myself, and therefore with my children, rather than perceiving them as "the problem". I knew where I was at with myself. It felt good. So different from the intense, out of control mood-swings of PMS when I had got my periods back after our second child.

But then two months ago when my Moon Time book was at the publishers, and I was feeling full of understanding of my cycle and all women, my cycle flipped to a red moon cycle - bleeding at the full moon, ovulating at the new moon. And what's more, the full moon hid behind winter clouds for two months.

Suddenly  I could not look up and know where I was. I felt at sea. Neither rooted in my body wisdom, or the moon's cycles. I felt wobbly and unsure. My PMS felt more out of control.

I needed an aide de memoire to help me to re-connect to where I was in both cycles. Enter the moon dial.  

I had been considering stocking them on my website, and had ordered a sample to check it for quality. It could not have arrived at a more opportune time. My moon time arrived on the same day! I turned Day 1 on the outer petals to align with the phase of the moon: full. Then jotted on the first petal the day's date and my symptoms. Then I aligned the  inner dial to the Wise Woman phase, and the middle one to the month of the year. Now I had a beautiful, visual reminder to help me keep track.


This has been my (almost) daily practice since: a simple way of checking in with myself, and with the moon, of grounding myself once more in my own rhythms and those of the heavens. 

An interesting addition to this has been noticing how the moon seems to effect the children too. The full moon energises them, and yet, on a red moon cycle, my energies are low at this time as I am bleeding. This is a challenging energetic dichotomy, but again, one which now I am mindful of it, becomes easier to manage without blame and anger, but simply by observing.

And so as I write, I am trying to consciously shift my cycle back to the white moon phase, as I feel much more attuned to myself, the moon's energy and my children's energies, when I ovulate at full moon. We are bringing full moon celebration into our family's monthly life together. As well as celebrating on the blog, the children and I observe the moon together as she waxes, guestimating when she will be full once more. Last month we went down to the beach, drew a labyrinth in the sand and walked it together, before singing, strolling and dancing in the moonlight. Next month we are planning a ceremonial fire in our garden. 

Are you attuned to your own cycle, and to the moon? Have you any experience with realigning your cycle and any wisdom you can share from your experiences?

***
Visit The Mindful Mama Homepage to find out how you can participate in the next Mindful Mama Carnival!
On Carnival day, please follow along on Twitter using the handy #MindMaCar hashtag. You can also subscribe to the Mindful Mama Twitter List and Mindful Mama Participant Feed.
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

• The Importance of a Moment Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama reflects on the need to slow down and breathe in life instead of rushing from one moment to the next.
• Mindful Playing With My Daughters Rani at Om She Said looked at her girls and realized that more than anything they wanted her right there next to them, playing, laughing, creating, and having fun; that's exactly what she did!
• Watch Your Words Patti at Canadian Unschooler challenges herself to make her words a reflection of her intentions.
• The Mindful Benefits of Knitting Dionna at Code Name: Mama shares how knitting has helped lift her out of depression and has given her a new form of meditation.
• Self Compassion: How Thinking About Bad Experiences Can Make You Happier and More Compassionate CJ at Imperfect Happiness challenges herself to be more compassionate...with herself.
• Calming the Home Environment by Selecting Traditional Toys Sam at Love Parenting discusses the benefits of natural toys.
• Quieting my Infernal Inner Ramblings Tree at Mom Grooves writes about her commitment to get out of her head and into the moment with her daughter and husband.
• Changing Our Everyday The Aniweda Dream is sizing up the changes they’ve made by moving across the country and looking at how to make their lives more mindful as a family.
• A Mindful Cup of Tea Amy at The Daily Muttering tells how she's trying to regain control of her life with the chaos of 3 kids thanks to the introduction of a simple daily ritual.
• Mindful Mama Moontime Lucy at Dreaming Aloud shares how becoming conscious of her moon time has helped her find balance in herself as a woman, and a mama.
• Speaking to the Need Shana at Tales of Minor Interest shares how she tries to stay mindful of her preschooler’s needs.
• Going Within Amy at Anktangle describes a centering practice she's been being more intentional about lately, and which she has come to realize is a precious gift in her life.
• Waking Up With Meditation Amy at PresenceParents shares how awakening with presence carries her through the day.
• Mindful Meditations Zoie at TouchstoneZ explores six weeks of seated meditation and discovers some things she doesn't expect.
• Mindfulness in the Kitchen - an Everyday Challenge Kelly at Becoming Crunchy shares how she’s been challenging herself to involve more mindfulness in everyday tasks - especially in the area of cooking for her family.